It’s Gonna Be Exactly Like Police
Academy
Written By: Rob Williams
Art By: Mike Dowling, Quinton Winter, Clem Robins
Cover Price: $3.99
Release Date: December 2, 2015
*Non-Spoilers and Score At The Bottom*
Remember how in the
beginning of Police Academy, we see
the future enrollees in their regular environments as citizens and learn of the
events that drive them to take advantage of the new relaxed requirements of the
academy? This is just like that. Except instead of the police academy, everyone
is going to mulit-billionaire social media app developer Larry Ferrell’s
private Caribbean island. And instead of attending due to a sense of social
justice or at least due to a questionable court order, it’s because they’ve all
been selected by Ferrell via a remotely-installed “140” app that endows them with
a hundred and twenty million dollars and a free trip to his isle. And instead
of a bunch of loveable misfits, so far we have seen some fairly problematic
people that might spike the punch at this millennial soiree. Well, I want to
see what’s going to happen, don’t you? I didn’t get the “140” app but I did pay
four bucks to read the comic book, so come along for my review!
Explain It!
The day has finally
arrived for recipients of Larry Ferrell’s digital Golden Ticket, the “140” app,
to convene on his privately-owned island Visitors Bliss Cay, presumably so they
can receive their portion of his wealth in the form of an oversized check and
in front of reporters as part of a publicity stunt. Ferrell doesn’t expect
everyone to come by Amtrak, though, no he’s dispatched a team of well-paid Men
in Black to fetch each lucky winner by private jet and bring them to Visitors
Bliss. And so we meet Japan’s most famous eccentric author Akira, novelist and
provocateur with half of his face tattooed who cut his own legs off at the
Imperial Palace in 2002. And still, he seems more stable than Mike Tyson. He
lives in a lavish, remote cabin deep within a wooded island with his boyfriend
who makes fun of and laughs at him. Two of Ferrell’s men show up to fetch
Akira, who is standing around with his junk hanging out, and he says some
cryptic stuff that seems to imply that he won’t be going with them, but could
really be interpreted either way.
On a lonely tarmac in
Alaska, two of Ferrell’s men stand by a waiting plane for Deacon Riggins, the
guy we saw at the end of the last issue praying before a wall full of guns. He
comes rolling in on his motorcycle singing the praises of the lord in that
unnerving way that wilderness survivalists have, and shows his luggage to the
escorts: a gigantic duffel bag with what I estimate to be approximately one
metric fuck ton of guns. One of Ferrell’s men balks at this, but the other
reminds him that they are to bring the winners with whatever luggage they bring,
which could really lead to some funny prank opportunities if you think about
it.
We reunite with our Wonder
Twins David and Devon, where sis argues with bro about going to Visitors Bliss
Cay and leaving her to fend for herself on the mean streets of Castle Point,
St. Louis. Which I should probably mention look pretty rough. The three dopes
they’d teamed up with last issue to rob David’s employer are standing around,
heckling the two and threatening David for his “140” inheritance when he gets
back from the island. David vacillates, even tries to force the escorts to
bring his sister, but it’s to no avail: he must go alone or forfeit his spot.
He is driven away in a limo and watches his sister recede in the back window,
then also glimpses a leopard walking across a crosswalk because oh yeah, this
is the kid who sees talking leopards and other hallucinations all the time.
Finally, we learn the
fascinating and terribly human story of Ravan Salehi, photographer for the BBC
stationed in Tehran, who has been documenting abuse against women and was about
to kill herself last issue. Now, she and Ferrell’s escorts have been captured
by Islamic militants who have no intention of allowing Ravan her all-expenses
paid trip to paradise, because let’s face it Islamic militants are super
jealous and can’t let anyone have fun. It looks hopeless until a guy in a
golden lion mask busts in and kills everyone. I’m gonna guess it’s Ferrell’s
BFF Rubenstein, who we met last issue, but since he’s in a mask I can’t say for
sure.
This is really a great
book. The art and colors are so good, I just want to eat it up with a fork and
spoon. Mike Dowling can render any environment and Quinton Winter adds those
color touches to make things lush or foreboding, as needed. And the way Dowling
doesn’t always capture movement at its apex lends an almost photographic
quality to the action. It’s just interesting enough to keep me hooked, which is
perfect when, you know, writing serialized fiction. I want to meet more of
these recipients of the “140” app and I want to see what’s happening on
Visitors Bliss Cay. Most of all, I want to know where Akira got those
prosthetic legs. I’m sick of walking on my own tibia like an idiot.
Bits and Pieces:
The intrigue deepens and
the characters unfold and things move along nicely in this issue. We learn
quite a bit about four characters chosen to receive the “140” app, guided
splendidly by Mike Dowling and Quinton Winter's artwork. If you passed on this book
because you thought it was like that stupid horror flick Unfriended that Eric was going on about earlier this year, then you
were wrong and you should apologize. Go to your local comic shop and tell the
retailer you’re sorry for doubting Rob Williams and proceed to buy up all stock
of Unfollow numbers one and two
immediately. The retailer will likely make you buy a few issues of Prez and Omega Men as penance, and frankly you should be lucky to get off
that light.
8.5/10
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