Holee Holocaustamolees
Written By:
Amanda Conner & Jimmy Palmiotti
Art By:
Billy Tucci, Joseph Michael Linsner, Flaviano, Paul Mounts
Lettered By:
Dave Sharpe
Cover Price:
$2.99
On Sale Date: August 24, 2016
**NON SPOILERS AND SCORE AT THE
BOTTOM**
One of my great failings as a reviewer and champion
of DC Comics’ digital-first line, besides getting my reviews in late and
generally being a mediocre writer, is that I do not read Bombshells. I did, at first—the first four or five chapters, and I
liked them okay. I thought the art was pretty good (though varied, as digital
books tend to be) and the concept was awesome, but it didn’t grab me. “I’ll
catch up later,” I told myself, or “I’ll get the trade.” Next thing I know
there’s three or four trades and I’m so behind on the series I’ll need to
dedicate a beachside vacation to it. Which is something, incidentally, I am
willing to do. I’ve just got no such plans until next March. So while I’m
angrily insisting in my reviews of Wonder
Woman ’77 and other digital titles that they are the sweetest comics deal
around, I’m not even reading one of the biggest digital titles. Someday, I
swear it! Luckily this issue of Harley’s
Little Black Book is an opportunity to glimpse the team in action, and
through them vicariously enjoy their digital comic that I’m sure is fantastic.
Why not join me in a trip through time, to the traumatic event that made my
grandparents’ generation the Greatest one, according to Tom Brokaw? Read on!
I know what you’re thinking: “How can Harley Quinn
team up with the Bombshells
characters, when they are from World War II while Harley is from the present
day?” To that, I would say: what are you, a freaking idiot? This is Harley Quinn.
She’ll do something stupid like walk into a freak wormhole or bite into a
time-traveling hot dog or any inane thing that could result in her landing in
war-torn Europe in the 1940s. You act like there has to be some succinct
science behind it, this character hangs out with an giant anthropomorphized egg
and talks to a half-burned stuffed beaver. It doesn’t have to make sense. Which
is a good thing, because Conner and Palmiotti have decided to make it as
complicated as possible: in the next issue—you know, the one coming in the
Fall? Harley and some buds fight aliens and wind up at Superman’s Fortress of
Solitude, where Harley grabs his balls. Not his testicles, but little spheres,
including a green one that allows time-travel. See? Is that so hard? She took
Superman’s time-travelling marble. Boom, now she’s in the past.
Specifically, she winds up in the fetid latrine of a
U.S. Army forward operating base in…Europe somewhere. Upon exiting the tent,
she is immediately mistaken for that era’s Harley Quinn, by that era’s Amanda
Waller! Wait, are these really the characters from that era? This is sort of an
alternate universe, isn’t it? It’s not like the Waller of today is like, “Oh, I
follow in the footsteps of my mom, Amanda Waller, who was a hero in the war.”
Besides, that would make nearly every character in the DCU a Junior. Harley
immediately gets whisked into a…what do they call them in the army, a
debriefing? Whatever it is, a plan to parachute onto the Alps and infiltrate Hozenverfen
Castle, where General Beatty is being held hostage. He has sensitive
information that cannot fall into the hands of the Nazis, which really should
go without saying. I mean, I suppose he could also tell the Nazis his favorite
color and how he likes his eggs, but it’s unlikely that they’d even ask.
Anyhow, Bombshells Batwoman and Bombshells Big Barda ‘chute to the Alps, right
outside of Hozenverfen Castle, because it’s time to get the show on the road.
In the town of Verfen, below the castle, Nazis are
whooping it up and taking in some evening entertainment in the form of
Bombshell Zatanna, who makes some light sexual innuendo. The clamor over
Zatanna gives Bombshell Catwoman, masquerading as a beer maid, time to slip
away and guide Harley and the other Bombshells through a secret tunnel into the
town. At the castle, a Nazi is petitioning Commander Hausser for permission to
manhandle the American General, but Hausser tells him that they must wait for
die Schlachterochter, a female interrogator specifically picked by Adolf Hitler.
There’s also an intimation that Hitler himself will be visiting that night,
which means this comic book is about to get really crowded. Usually Harley
Quinn teams up with one or two people, but this time she has to cozy up with an
entire battalion consisting of the entire female DCU, in Bombshell form. The
newly-arrived ladies slip into some authentic German stripper costumes so as to
mingle with the Austrians, and as Harley looks at the castle high atop the
mountain, she’s struck by a car—carrying Bombshell Harley Quinn!
Bombshell Harley Quinn (we’ll call her “B-Harley
Quinn”) gets out of the car and rushes to Harley Quinn (we’ll call her…well,
we’ll just call her Harley Quinn), and as they touch there’s a terrific
explosion! This knocks them out cold, but B-Harley Quinn comes to when she’s
called by her fake Nazi name, which, if you hadn’t guessed by now, is Dr.
Heydich, die Schlachterochter. They rush inside and B-Harley explains that she
is working under deep cover as a Nazi stooge to get close to Hitler, an
opportunity that has presented itself that very night. The Bombshells are
incredulous that they would be on competing missions, a scathing indictment of
our military’s bureaucratic trappings. Hey Palmiotti and Conner, politics are
for the newspapers, okay? Let’s not whip the comics-reading public into a
frothing fervor over the issue of Army inefficiency! Harley is out cold during
all of this, and while the Bombshells consider what to do with her now that
she’s pretty much compromised the mission, Harley has this awesome dream…you
know what? I’m not even going to spoil it. Buy the book if you want to see it.
I’m just going to leave two words: Count
Jokula. Yeah, you want to check this out.
Harley wakes up in a meat locker, tied to a chair.
Somehow, Harley Quinn figures out that the explosion between her and B-Harley
created a parallel dimension where she can do anything without causing
repercussions to the present? But, haven’t we already proven that this is not
the past? I’m so confused. Harley proves some point by kissing B-Harley on the
mouth, but all it proved to me is that I’m a dirty old man. Despite her
insistence that she can be of help to them, now that she isn’t prone to random
explosions, they decide to leave her tied up because, you know, she sounds
pretty insane. Once B-Harley gets into Castle Hozenverfen, she asks to see
General Beatty, who she then explains the plan. The rest of the Bombshells are
waiting in the town of Verfen for a signal, then they will rush the castle and
murder a bunch of Nazis and fairly well save the day. Harley is able to free
herself from her binds, however, and somehow winds up in the same car as Adolf
Hitler on the way to the Castle! And you know what? I’m going to leave it here.
A whole bunch of other wacky shit happens, including some wholesale killing and
the entrance of the rest of the Bombshells, but if you’re not enticed to read
by now, then you’ll never be. And this recap is almost as long as a World War
II history textbook, anyway.
I really enjoyed this issue, even though it was
tonally a little different than most Harley
Quinn books. She was still the same loveable klutz we’ve always known, but
these Bombshell trappings lent some gravitas
to the proceedings. The art ranged from good to great, depending on the artist,
but was largely unlike the art we get in the regular Harley Quinn books by Conner and Palmiotti. For once, Harley Quinn
actually seemed like just another character in her own comic book. I can’t
really explain it, I mean she is the
cause of most of the mayhem and destruction as usual, but I was more engrossed
by the story and the mission. Reading this comic book made me realize something
very important: I really ought to be reading Bombshells.
Bits and
Pieces:
A densely-layered story full of intrigue and
downright hilarious moments that suffers from uneven artwork. The extant
Bombshell Harley Quinn being in the same space as, uh, our Harley Quinn creates
a temporal problem that I’m sure will have repercussions in future comics.
Palmiotti and Conner never throw anything away, they’re like pack rats. Harley
Quinn will be eating an ice cream cone in one issue, and then half a year later
it will turn out that she ate Proty II by accident. I’m telling you. You gotta
watch everything with these guys.
8/10
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