I gotta tell you, this idea Sinestro has of policing the universe through fear...it's pretty solid. I mean, that's what it really is, right? You don't slow down on the highway when passing a cop car or put out that PCP blunt and reverse your "OFF THE PIGS" t-shirt on your way into the Police Athletic League out of mutual respect. You're afraid of being arrested. And while some segments of American society have more to fear than other segments, we all tow the line because we don't want to be smashed face down with some fat guy's knee in our back as we've seen so many times on COPS. So Sinestro's plan to grab the strongest people from each word and extract their fear for his jury-rigged yellow lantern is actually a lot better than that. Give up a portion of society to keep the rest safe and comfortable. Which, again, is sort of how it works in the real world also. Okay, enough delicate politicizing! On to my review of Hal Jordan and the Green Lantern Corps #5!
Guy Gardner is having a bad day. At least, most people would consider it a bad day, Guy Gardner just sees it as another challenge to bluster his way through. He's being tortured by the Sacrament, that once-reviled cult that now fuels the Fear Engine at the behest of Sinestro. This session is special, however, because Sinestro wants to know the location of the Green Lantern Corps. Extracting whatever meager drops of succulent fear that can be wrung from Gardner is just a bonus. Because, of course, Guy Gardner ain't telling them jack. In fact, all he will do is recite the Green Lantern oath, while the Sacramentotum whips him or zaps him with electricity or something. If I was being tortured by the Sacrament, I would just shriek the lyrics to Small Wonder over and over again. "SHE'S FANTASTIC! MADE OF PLASTIC! MICROCHIPS HERE AND THEEEERRREE!!!" Elsewhere on Warworld, Sinestro is brooding again and Lyssa is on his jock again and they eventually sleep together, an act which seems as perfunctory as renewing your driver's license. Sinestro admits that this Hal Jordan...vexes him so, and the fact his own daughter Soranik Natu made off his Jordan's unconscious form really grinds his gears. Lyssa suggests that Sinestro might have to kill his own daughter, because that's just the kind of bitch she is.
Speaking of Soranik Natu, she's hanging out with Hal while he recovers from being cut in half and sewn back together with yellow lantern thread because that's a normal surgical procedure to cure unconsciousness on her home planet of Korugar. You don't want to see what they have to do for a root canal. As she helps Hal to his feet, she explains that she had to remove his ring while he was on the table, so he wouldn't fight her bizarre body modifying. In fact, they have a whole conversation where Soranik clues Hal in on all the stuff that happened while he was off in deep space: Sinestro was dying, Soranik took over the Sinestro Corps and made everyone like it, then Sinestro healed himself using Parallax's creamy essence and resumed his campaign of spreading fear and order throughout the universe. Since she showed him hers, Hal shows her his: when he puts on the ring he constructed entirely from his own will, and turns his arm into green Jell-O! Despite this handicap that actually sounds pretty awesome, Hal says he's going to fight Sinestro, without Soranik's help, without anyone's help because he's the last Green Lantern ever, and that makes him the best and he's gonna fight and Hal's gonna win!
Elsewhere in space, John Stewart and Kilowog are shepherding Mogo and the rest of the Corps through space to find Guy Gardner, when they come upon a fleet of space ships! Before firing a warning shot that almost destroys several craft, John Stewart comes off all tough guy until he's greeted with delight! Turns out a bunch of aliens from around the galaxy have banded together to retrieve the people kidnapped from their worlds by the Sinestro Corps--they're taking the fight to Warworld!
Now that all of these pieces are converging on Warworld, and we're actually going to see the Green Lantern Corps in some kind of action, I am getting excited for this series. It was a slow burn, and in truth much of this issue is given over to reiterating the overall story, but there are enough developments to pique my interest. And besides, I think we all needed a good reinforcement of the plot before we go into this arc's climactic conclusion. Hal looked really strange in this issue, almost like old school Sylvester Stallone or something, but it was alright. There is a splash page of the Corps in profile soaring through space that is worth the cover price alone!
Bits and Pieces:
The final tumblers are in place to make this story a lock...hopefully. It took a little longer to get to this point than I'd have liked, but now that we're about to see a crazy conflict I'm getting pretty excited. Hal Jordan really acts over the top on his narcissism this issue, and I love to see him cast as a one-dimensional blowhard. If that bothers you, however, be forewarned. This book has heated up and is worth your time and hard-earned money! Or even your stolen money, I don't judge how you get it!