Friday, March 13, 2015

Top 5 Fridays: Unlucky Characters In The New 52

In honor of today being Friday the 13th and because Jim told me I wasn't allowed to talk about horror flicks anymore on the site, today we'll be looking at the Unlucky Characters In The New 52.  Also, I want to talk about this because I'm holding on to the idea that the New 52 isn't over like everyone else in interwebs land keeps on saying.  Now this is more of a personal list of characters that I feel sorry for because of what they've had to go through and I know it's the nature of the beast for superhero comics to keep the drama on high so that the characters continue being interesting but this list will include characters that have gone above and beyond the the normal level of drama and tragedy that can be dumped on them........... and really ones that I just think have gotten the shaft pretty damn hard.  Okay, it's Friday the 13th and I expect all of you out there to get your horror movies on tonight, so let's get to it.

#5.  Bizarro

Who would have thought that an under cooked clone of Superman could go and steal our hearts in the midst of a total villain takeover of the world?  I know it baffles the mind but that's exactly what this character did and since we're getting a more classic Bizarro in June and the fact that it takes five years to cook one of these wrong clones up, it looks like this will be the last we'll ever see of that obedient lovable fire breathing Bizarro.  In the beginning he simply came off as a numb wit that was completely faithful to Luthor and you know what?  He ended that way too and knowing that he affected Luthor the way he did........... with the power of love, it was enough to capture our hearts too and he had the unlucky fortune to be brought into the world at it's most dangerous.  I guess we were lucky enough to have him fight for our heroes and actually die one himself.  Poor poor Bizarro.

#4.  Plastic Man
We have yet to get a proper Plastic Man story going on in the New 52 and after the character was introduced as a possible candidate for the Justice League International and immediately passed over, we didn't see the character again until his time flubbed origin story in Forever Evil.  I don't get it, the character is around, disappears and then we see his origin and he disappears again.......... At least we'll see him in Convergence being his nonsensical self but I really feel that the New 52 gave Eel O'Brian the shaft by not having him around more than those two instances.  Besides for Convergence though, it looks like Plastic Man is so unlucky that we won't see him for a long time coming because even though people have tried to put him in comics, he must have pissed someone off at DC seriously......... That's right, these characters are real to me........ What of it?

#3.  Vibe

I never would have thought that Vibe could actually be turned into a cool character and I remember a week before it was announced that Geoff Johns would be bringing the character into the New 52, I was at my local comic shop and actually going through some old Justice League of America issues just so the owner and I could rag on him......... Then the book came out and I loved Cisco Ramon and I had to eat my words.  So Cisco loses his brother when he gets his powers, he becomes a part of the Justice League of America, is betrayed by ARGUS, Forever Evil happens and he's imprisoned in the Firestorm Matrix and when all that is over the JLA disbands and for whatever reason Vibe is missing and it doesn't seem like anyone is trying to find him.  Now that's some shitty luck right there.  I hope to see Vibe again soon, but at this point it doesn't look likely and it's not like his luck is going to bring him back because as I just demonstrated......... It's pretty shitty.

#2.  Alfred Pennyworth

Since the New 52 began it seems like Alfred can't catch a break.  The Court of the Owls killed his father, Joker has kidnapped him, joker gassed him and just the other week........ cut his damn hand off!  It's been a weird couple of years for our favorite butler and as of right now it looks like he's being put into early retirement so that his daughter can replace him down in the Batcave.  Now don't get me wrong I like Julia Pennyworth but she will never be her father and I feel that Alfred has been suffering from being unlucky enough to have Scott Snyder take his "Somebody has to get hurt" vision out on him alone.  Unlike Damian who gets killed and comes back with superpowers, I doubt that anything good will come from Alfred's current tragedies.

#1.  Starfire

Starfire has been getting the shaft all her life and that's not a double entendre because she's promiscuous......... or at least because she comes off that way.  Born a princess, made a slave, rejected by Nightwing and having a relationship with Arsenal........ I don't care what you say, having a relationship with someone that Damian Wayne refers to as "Red Neck Man" is a about as unlucky as it comes.  Her whole life was stripped from her at a young age and she spent her entire life having to feel pain and having to fight to make that pain stop.  It's about as bad as it gets and hopefully in June Starfire will find a bit of luck when she gets her own solo book but as of right now, in my mind at least; she's the unluckiest character in the New 52.

That's it for this list and while you might disagree with some or have someone you think that should be on this list, this was more of characters that have stuck in my mind as being unlucky and by no means reflects their actual luck or how bad someone else has had it compared to these characters.  So yeah, there might be other characters out there that have it worse but these are the ones that I feel sorry for.  Let us know if you have any ideas for unluckier characters or feel that I'm really off base here but for now that's it.  I hope everyone has a wonderful and safe weekend and we'll see you in seven..................... Oh and you better be watching some horror flicks tonight!
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  1. No horror films, but I was reading Scott Snyder's run on Swamp Thing. That count?

    I'd also put Dick Grayson on the list. I know Grayson's supposed to be great, but having his identity exposed like that in Forever Evil has to be awful for him.

    1. *Finished reading both parts of Rotworld when saw this comment XD*

    2. I don't know, DIck seems pretty lucky to me with the exception of his parents getting killed. Every attempt that Dan Didio takes to kill him fails.

  2. I'm not gonna lie, I'm surprised you didnt say Earth 2...just Earth 2 in general XD

  3. Hey Eric,
    #1: You can keep your horror comic talk for your other site and Podcast: "Gingerdead Blog"

    #2: The New 52 is dead and as Jud Crandall said, "Sometimes dead is better."


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