Wednesday, June 21, 2023

Catwoman #56 Review


Writer: Tini Howard
Artist: Marcus To, Marco Santucci
Cover Price: $3.99
Release Date: June 20, 2023

I haven't reviewed Catwoman on our site in a while, but I am back!  The reason is simple - I am not so bright and was running out of synonyms for "terrible." Seriously, saying something sucks over and over might sound neat, but it will only get you so far in the cut-throat world of comic book reviews.  However, I saved up enough money and went out and bought a Thesaurus, and BOOM!  Now I can tell you all this book appalling, dismaying, and abominable!  Thank you, Roget, wherever you are!

The issue starts with Catwoman checking in on Dario while Onyx is checking her out, and while Tini Howard tries to get this story moving forward, it's just a reminder that this book has been a complete fucking mess for a very long time.  

Tini already proved beyond a shadow of a doubt that she has no idea how prisons operate, and in this issue, you can add "tough gang talk" to that growing NO CLUE list.  I know Onyx and Selina are discussing important things here, so why am I laughing so hard?  Oh yea, because the dialogue sucks!  Wait a second.  Strike that.  I meant the conversation is odious.

After seeing one of the Trixie gals making manicotti (it wouldn't be a Tini book without some food), Selina plays a hunch, saves some girls, whips some bombs (seriously), and grabs Dutchess the cat.  Now, for some reason, Selina thinks Dutchess owes her a favor for scooping her kitty liter, which is cute.  But Selina, what about the street flavors of ramen that Dutchess somehow got to the prison and into the ventilation system so she could push them to you in solitary confinement?  On second thought, that made no damn sense, so screw it!  I say that, but Selina gives Dutchess a message for Marquise, and Dutchess is back to being a vent cat!  #VentCat4Life

Watch our Catwoman #56 Video Review

On our podcast, Eric keeps saying that Dutchess somehow has the soul of Valmont in her.  As ridiculous as that sounds, it would make way more sense than what's going on in this book right now!

Things continue with Eiko and Ibanescu fighting while spouting god-awful dialogue, Dario and Noah fighting while spouting god-awful dialogue, Selina and Black Mask... You get the gist.

By the end, Tini Howard sets the book up for the Gotham War and Knight Terrors, but maybe "sets up" is giving the Bat Signal in the sky and the "Next: Knight Terrors" a bit too much credit, but you know me, always looking on the bright side of things.

This book sucks!  It feels like Tini Howard is trying desperately to make sense of her overly convoluted narrative and is sinking fast.  Hopefully, Chip Zdarsky can save her and this book once we get to the Gotham War, but there is a greater possibility that this garbage stinks up the whole joint.  The art isn't as good as Nico Leon's, but everything besides the art makes this one of the worst books at DC Comics right now, so who cares?!?  Looking at the sales numbers... not many people!

Bits and Pieces:

Catwoman #56 is a terrible issue in an increasingly awful series.  I can't recommend this to anyone since I don't know why I keep reading it myself.


1 comment:

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