Written by: Peter J. Tomasi
Art by: Marcio Takara, Chris Sotomayer and Wes Abbott
Cover Price: $3.99
Release Date:November 4, 2015
Last week started something that I bet Eric would never happen...Jim Gordon's Mecha Batman became a part of the Justice League. You see, they needed a detective and I guess Barry was too shy to speak up because I think he could have fit the bill just fine. I still think that it was all about the marketing deal they signed which may or may not have small print that says, "No Batman-No Deal"!
Back to the book, last week's cliffhanger left us in the Himalayas staring at a giant skeleton of some sort and wondering what the hell was going on. I guess I need a detective too. So, what is going on? Let's find out...
The issue starts off right where it left off and I mean both the location and Gordon's bad dialogue. They wanted a Detective, Jim, not a substitute for Dane Cook (and yes, that is a huge insult). Things get even funnier when I realized that the reason they needed Gordon was to figure out what happened to a couple of dead (maybe) alien creatures. It really seems like a job that a forensic scientist would be really good at. Anyone know where they can find a forensic scientist? Maybe Barry knows.
Tomasi then gives us page after page of the League investigating the remains of two dead creatures and coming up with what felt like a crazy (and really gory) theory about what happened. Just because it's right doesn't change the fact that it didn't make much sense.
It's all a bit boring until a third alien shows up and this one is alive. Alive, but not well. It attacks the Justice League with Aqueous Humor (I'm not joking) that sort of ties into the beginning of last issue. Actually, it doesn't at all except for both involving eye fluid.
Cyborg saves Gordon and then the two come up with a plan that was supposed to bring the feels, but left me shaking my head. Cyborg would project the image of the alive alien's mother on her skeleton, making it happy and allowing them to sneak by and save the Justice League. Don't ask me what happens when the beast feels that mommy is still a skeleton because the plan works. Go figure.
Immediately after being freed, the League has to attend to a very convenient earthquake in El Salvador leaving Gordon to sing a lullaby to the beast as it dies. Seven panels of singing and dying end the issue and maybe I'm dead inside, but it actually made me laugh.
I'm going to say it now, this issue was pure filler. I would love to paint a prettier picture because Tomasi is one of my favorite writers, but I can't. It's obvious that these first couple issues are only here to bridge the gap until we get to Robin War. a fact that he pretty much told our Reggie at NYCC this year. While that's unfortunate, it's still up to the writer to give readers a good story and he doesn't deliver.
I was a little worried about Marcio Takara's art and how it would fit this book, but I am no longer worried. I really like the art this month and can't wait to see what he does when he gets to stretch out his wings a bit when this book gets back to Gotham where it belongs.
Bits and Pieces:
This issue is filler to get this book to next month's Robin War. Whether you read this book or not, you can skip this issue and miss nothing at all. I do like Marcio Takara's art, but the story is a forced, ridiculous and completely forgettable. It may not be the story that Tomasi wanted to tell, but when your name's on the cover, you have to do better. That day will come soon, it's just not today.