Monday, August 12, 2019

Vampirella #1 Review

Writer: Christopher PreistArtist: Ergun GunduzPublisher: Dynamite EntertainmentRelease Date: July 17, 2019Cover Price: $3.99

Ah yes, Vampirella. The sexy Horror...   Star that we all know and love is celebrating 50 years in the comic industry!  To kick off the blood bath is a new number one in what is either the fifth or sixth volume of the title, depending on who you ask.  

The staff brought on by Dynamite to debut this series is impressive, as a Christopher Priest and Ergün Gündüz are exciting names to attach to any project.  But will this new series be a hit or will it do what vampires do best, and suck?  Personally, I'm really hoping for a bit more action in the upcoming issues, or it'll be a quick drop.  

Now, there were two women who ruled the pages of my pubescent “reading” materials.  One being Tyra Banks, featured in my stash of stolen Victoria Secret catalogs.  The other being none other than Vampirella, in all her spread-eagle blood-soaked seductive glory.  

So I'd like to take this celebratory moment to thank both heroines, for helping a young and scared little Lord Andy discover himself and grow up to be the weird perverted kinky freak he is today.. Or does everyone love ridiculously beautiful women dressed in nothing but dental floss and high heels? Covered or Uncovered in blood? Whatever your thing happens to be?

But back to the issue at hand, Vampirella #1 reads like a conversation between a trauma therapist and their patient.  Probably because the issue is 19 pages of a patient (Vampirella) and a weird and confusing character of a trauma therapist.  I don't know if this guy is an ignorant old man way out of his professional realm, or he's secretly a fucking wizard.

I appreciate the effort to make the first issue a lighthearted and original way to catch readers up on what's new in the Vampirellaverse.  However, it may leave some folks a bit more confused on Vampirella's origins, which I understand will be explained in many different ways in the many issues to come.  

But who really wants that?  I think origin story arc has been milked dry across the comic world for a few years now, and as excited as I may be to see where Priest takes this run, I am fucking over origin stories!

Though the issue may have a dialog to blood-filled action imbalance, it does not lack enjoyable art.  Gündüz is only one of the artists featured, as the last ten pages of the book are dedicated to the countless variant covers.  In other words, over thirty percent of your $3.99 before tax went to see what the outside of the book you just bought could've looked like. Wow!

If you're keeping track at home, that's now an origin story AND variant covers! And if you too, just got a slight knot in your stomach, maybe we should just wait for the trade back.  But if you're like, really really into Vampirella, and not just for the blood-covered body, but more importantly her interesting and now even more complicated backstory, than this is your book. 

Final Thoughts:

Is Vampirella an alien?  Is she from another realm?  Is she wearing anything beneath that modest costume of hers?  We'll just have to wait and see. Whether this new series is a wash or success, this fanboy is just happy to see his childhood goddess back on the new issue table.


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