Wednesday, January 18, 2017

Raven #5 Review and **SPOILERS**

That San Francisco Repeat

Writer: Marv Wolfman 
Penciller: Diogenes Neves 
Inker: Ruy Jose 
Colorist: Blond 
Letterers: A Larger World 
Cover Artist: Stephanie Hans 
Cover Price: $2.99 
On Sale Date: January 18, 2016


San Francisco! It’s a hell of a city. I’d move there, but it’s as or more expensive than the place I currently live. And I live in a golden tower!

Okay, I got nothing. Here’s my review of Raven #5, hopefully that makes amends.
Explain It!

Regular readers of the reviews on this website will note I have given this book a “Fuck You 5.” This means that I don’t just dislike this book, I dislike what it stands for and represents. I believe this comic book has inflicted more harm than good, and so I #Resist it. But that “Fuck You 5” is a double entendre, because I am also saying “fuck you” to there being a fifth issue in this miniseries, as it is completely unnecessary. I’m not sure the phony terrorist dalliance in the fourth issue was entirely relevant, either, but this issue is absolute nonsense. Wait, no, it’s not absolute nonsense. The artwork is okay. But the story, and how long we’ve been strung along with nothing only to get what we can only hope will be a massive infodump in the sixth issue, is garbage.
That’s right, I called it garbage. I know it’s not over. I know the next issue will be gangbusters. But this series will be forever tainted by sthis fifth issue, its pointlessness and obvious extension of this series that stinks of a cash grab. Is there any compelling reason this couldn’t have been a two-issue story in Teen Titans? Or perhaps a story entirely untold? I feel like I am learning nothing about Raven, nothing about this White Carnival, nothing about her creepy religious Aunt, nothing whatsoever issue after issue as the story stands absolutely still. And that’s literal, in this case: Raven pretty much stands in one spot recapping what’s already happened for the entire issue. I kid you not. It’s a damn shame, is what it is.
You wanna know what happens? Raven is hanging out by the giant glowing people-absorbing orb from space, which is also being filmed by the evening news. Everyone sees her there and figures out that Rachel is also Raven of the Teen Titans. So her cousin bikes down there to be a martyr and gets caught up by the orb, which makes Raven snap out and go almost full Trigon! Almost…but then catches herself and watches her cousin get absorbed because of Raven’s most solemn responsibility not to become a world-conquering demon. It’s like something was almost going to happen, but that couldn’t be allowed because we’ve got to have this go on for another issue. At the very end, because Raven is weakened by Hulking out or whatever, she gets swept into the glowing orb, finally.
What a load of crap. If this was an episode of a TV series, it would be cancelled outright. I feel very cheated by this series. Seems like this was a better opportunity for an OGN than six single issues. I reiterate, though: despite my mean score, the art is pretty good.

Bits and Pieces:

A pointless issue in a frustrating miniseries. If you've been reading, you'll learn nothing of significance this issue. If you haven't been reading, then lord how I envy you.


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