Wednesday, June 13, 2018

Mister Miracle #9 Review



What a Tweest!

Written by: Tom King
Art by: Mitch Gerads and Clayton Cowles
Cover Price: $3.99
Release Date: June 13, 2018


After war comes peace. The bloody battles that waged across New Genesis and Apokolips have come to an end, and now Mister Miracle and Kalibak must sit down and discuss a truce. Can Scott Free trust the former minions of Darkseid to keep their word? Not likely, but a leader sometimes has to take a risk in service to the greater good. Perhaps the more pressing question, though, is whether Big Barda can make it through the negotiations without beating the life out of the assassin Kanto. 



It's no secret that I have been on the bottom of the barrel of reviews for this book.  While I keep waiting for the big reveal of what is really going on, most are just gushing over this book.  Still, I can't help but grind the couple teeth I have left (my mother is British, you know!) when I see phrases like "I have no idea what is going on here" followed a few sentences later with "this is a story for the ages."  Which one is it guys and gals?  But still, it's no fun always being on the bottom (wink wink), But here I am once again.  I am going to treat this review the same way that Tom King writes his story...I will give you the bare minimum of information and you can decide if you like the book or not...though it seems most have made up their minds before even reading.  I'm convinced half of the reviewers of this book haven't read an issue in months since they keep on posting the same generic reviews.  Here goes...


The issue opens with the beginnings of a New Gods summit meeting on Apokolips.  We get the juxtaposition of the horrific with the mundane.





Now all of a sudden the images do show up and the quotes have disappeared. - Michiel


We continue with a piss break and a loogie that takes 18 panels to hit its mark.  It may or may not be an important scene by the end.  Is what we're seeing real?  What is really real?  It certainly shows the juxtaposition of the horrific with the mundane.

Kalibak gives Mister Miracle the Goodness Mirror and he sees that he isn't beautiful on the outside...but is he still Granny's on the inside?  We also learn about Bone Wine and how Barda used to sneak a drink or two back in the day.  It does show...you get the point by now.  If you don't, let me spell it out for you...NOTHING MUCH HAPPENS IN THIS ISSUE OR SERIES EXCEPT THE JUXTAPOSITION OF THE HORRIFIC WITH THE MUNDANE!  We get it!  I saw it in A Clockwork Orange, Pulp Fiction and a hundred other things over the years.  It isn't new here and after nine issues I am mad and bored.



Continuing, Darkseid doesn't agree to the terms of peace but instead wants baby Jacob.  Darkseid wants the baby! Oh my, it's like what Scott went through...peace for a baby!  Oh my goodness!





He who fights with monsters should look to it that he himself does not become a monster. And if you gaze long into an abyss, the abyss also gazes into you. - Michiel



I am a fan of Mitch Gerads and even though I don't think the way he goes about the nine-panel layout necessarily uses it to its utmost purpose, his attention to detail at times is awesome.  In fact, most of what I've gotten from the story is all him because the actual story is hardly there.  Tom King tries (and with most, succeeds) into convincing fans that lack of details and plot makes things smart and deep, but it all depends on hitting the landing at the end.  The problem is, even if the landing is hit, you have wasted eleven issues getting there and holding people hostage that long without a nibble of a comprehensive story has to go against the Geneva Conventions.  Then again, the fandom he's created around this book feels a bit like Stockholm syndrome by now so I guess he knows what he is doing.  

While I can sometimes go with a journey over destination philosophy, this journey has been confusing at best and infuriating for most of the trip.  Couple that with the Emperor's New Clothes type reviews and I just keep yelling, "Are we there yet?"  Hopefully, when we pull into the parking lot, Wally World will be open for business and we will all finish up with smiles on our faces!

Bits and Pieces:

Another chapter and another bunch of nine-panel pages that hopefully mean something more in a couple of months.  Reviewing Mister Miracle is. Driving. Me. Crazy!


FU5/10





29 comments:

  1. I didn't know exactly what I was reading in this review, but it's definitely one for the ages!
    Jim Werner can do no wrong and I'll read any review he writes because he's just that awesome!
    If you've been missing out on any reviews by Jim, this is the time to check them out! He's just so good that you won't regret it!
    Mind. Blown. There's just so much deeper meaning behind all these quotes and images in this review that no one will understand, unless you've followed along since Jim's Mister Miracle #1 review.
    Stop reading this comment and go back and read them... YOU WON'T REGRET IT!

    Jim Werner is.

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  2. Well done! A review of the ages! 10\10! I came to shit in the center of my toilet seat but I only needed the edge.

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  3. I think sadly, MM is what passes for a serious comic these days. Intentionally(and unintentionally-King just isn't a good writer) murky and confusing. Things happen. People talk..and talk. Poorly done traced art. This is the worst the new gods have ever looked.

    I think this is the era of low expectations, comics are in such bad shape broadly that anything that seems halfway intelligent is praised. I really hate this book-i hate the millenial way Barda and Scott talk and act.

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  4. If there were a way to rate this review, i'd rate it very poorly. Not because I agree or disagree, but the reviewer doesn't deliver any argument to validate a statement. Instead he or she uses uses quotes from "high-brow' sources to gain credibility. Ultimately leading to the one thing the quotes appear to address; pretentiousness...

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    1. I really hope you are joking because what you are saying is the exact point of this review 100% and you didnt comment on the pictures

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    2. I see no pictures, only black boxes...

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    3. Seriously the images do not appear, instead I see black boxes for the most part.

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    4. Exactly...black boxes of our souls

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    5. You want the gist of it all...this book is pretentious garbage that people love because other people love because they take not knowing what is going on as intelligent and deep. It gets great reviews because it gets great reviews and its a big circle jerk of reviewers who want to pretend to get it. Its the kardashians of comics...famous for being famous and if its the future of comics, god save us all.

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    6. Haha that is ironic, however I still don't understand the black images. In my ignorance I'd assume that they should be images.

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    7. Now all of a sudden the images do show up and the quotes have disappeared.

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    8. I'm changing up the review every day now.

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    9. You just don't understand it...your taste isn't high enough to realize how genius this review is...idiot

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    10. He who fights with monsters should look to it that he himself does not become a monster. And if you gaze long into an abyss, the abyss also gazes into you.

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    11. Yes but did you blink because Jim didn't. (am I nailing the King Stans Vibe yet or do I need to try to give him more Batcat advice?)

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    12. Oh Jim I wanna marry you for that review! Hope your wife don't mind. I'm a great cook and can do all kinds of chores. Billy Bowyer go suck your thumb and then comment on something that shouldn't be. Jim has been doing this since ever and knows what's purposeful story and what pretentious pantomime. The direction using the jail panels and casual talk ruins everything. If the writer suffers from incarceration mentality it's not the reader's fault for rejecting it.

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  5. You know guys I really don't feel like this was a bad issue. This has to be the best thing Tom King has writt...ha ha lol. I can't even Finnish this ridiculous joke anymore this is Lost Garbage that is confused for buried treasure. Issue #9 and I still can't tell if this reality or some kind dream. Preach the word Jim.
    FUCK U 5/10

    This the worst story king has ever written.

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    1. Yep...my suggestion to everyone is pick up Mark Millar's The Magic Order #1 instead of this and see how a real dark story is written.

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  6. I'm sorry you don't like this, or that it's going completely over your head, because you're clearly missing out on a nuanced and very thoughtful book. Gerads' art is wonderful and King is writing a story for the ages.

    But no, you're right, it's "pretentious garbage" and literally everyone else who likes the book is just a sucker who "takes not knowing what is going on as intelligent and deep". Amiright?

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    1. STOP WITH YOUR BULLSHIT "nuanced and very thoughtful book" GARBAGE!!!!! That's all I hear and it's a 10/10 because you describe it that way. Since you are a fucking genius who knows what's going on, explain it to me. Or better yet, actually show your name you coward! Go to all the other sites who give it a 10/10 with no reason other than it's "a story for the ages" At least I go out on a limb and tell you how I feel about it unlike the 99% of the phony people out there! Go fuck yourself!!!!!

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    2. please, lay it all out on the line and we will see if the book you seem to get is even the book you seem to get by the end. If it is, then good for you, but you won't tell me because if your wrong, you will look like a fool like most of the others reviewing it.

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    3. Alright dumb fuck, I'm going to assume this goes right over your thick fucking skull, but here it goes....

      You can either take this book one of two ways: very literally (as in what you see on the page is exactly what you get) or that everything shown to us since Scott tried to kill himself, is a trap that Scott is stuck in. My guess is that MM is in an elaborate trap built by the Lump, a classic Kirby throwaway villain. The weird panel distortions, the "Darkseid Is" panels, and Barda's eyes changing color all hint at this. Shit, even the story that Kanto tells Scott about the master painter and his apprentice hint at this. The painting is so good that "it's just what is." I believe the trap Scott is stuck in is so good that "it's just what is" to Scott.

      Either way, it shouldn't really change the way you're reading the book so far. We don't know for sure it's a trap, and neither does Scott. It's not even on his mind. So you should probably take everything you've read so far literally. Which means that Scott is now the leader of New Genesis, he and Barda have a kid, Orion is dead, Granny is dead, and in an effort to end the war between New Genesis and Apokolips, Scott is meeting with Kalibak to negotiate peace. It's pretty fucking simple.

      The book also doubles as a commentary on the living in America right now. There's a ton of paranoia in our country and a sense that "this can't be happening." Scott demonstrates these feelings constantly and I think the book does a wonderful job of capturing the everyday depression that a lot of people go through.

      And I have no problem "looking like a fool." If I'm wrong, I'm wrong and the story surprised me in a way I wasn't expecting, which is a good thing. You don't have to like the book, but goddamn do you look like an asshole when you act like this.

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    4. David that still don't excuse the fact the vagueness of what King story is, is boring. We have characters like the New gods, Darksied, Kalibak, etc. These are heavy hitters that can bring some serious action to the story, but king focuses on the Literal mundane aspects of Scott and barda. We have gods and for the most part they are fucking talking to each other. After 9 issue king is still playing at something he was playing at in issue one. (There is no development of the story) × (there's no balls to the wall action with god level characters) = equals a shitty Book.

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    5. Thanks Dave. I have mentioned on the podcast and my reviews that I think it is a trap as well...also a story that Tom King is writing as a look into how he felt as a man starting a family and going off to fight a war.

      As far as depression goes, I think a lot of the stuff we are seeing is Scott's mind building barriers to cover up the pain of his child abuse from Granny.

      That being said, the my point of this review was that he is extending a 4 issue story into a 12 issue thing and I think that is BS and it all hinges on the last issue and I can't in my right mind say something is a story for the ages until it is over. I have also said a million times that I think it will end up wrapping up well, but again, I can't give a 10/10 for an issue where Scott and Barda are talking about renevating their apartment.

      I also think that he misplayed things a bit by making the war seem secondary and couple it with "the mundane" because when we get to this issue, the war part holds no weight. We are here more for the surprise ending than any peace talks and because of that, I had a lower score.

      There is a BIG difference between reading and reviewing a book. Personally, I need more than hope it ties together and the individual issues are probably not meant to be reviewed as such anyway. This is obviously a book that is written as a whole (why they didn't do a 1-6 issue trade) and to review each issue alone is hard.

      And I don't care how I look since I am already tagged as the guy who "doesn't get it". I'm sure you came to read the review as a "hate read" and I wasn't even going to review it in the first place. If you haven't seen, it's why I put up a second opinion review because I know most people like this book way more than me.

      Plus, I suffer from severe depression and I don't need a wonderful job of capturing the thing that has crippled me all my life!!!!

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    6. basic speak...calling this a story for the ages is printing the headline of a super bowl winner at halftime. Let's see if it all ties together and makes sense before making grand statements.

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